Ebook or Paper? You Decide!

Every now and again, the ‘battle’ between ebooks and paper books rears its head again, in the columns of media outlets with slow news days on their hands.  I think, as I have always thought, that it’s kind of silly, so I wrote a silly thing in response.  If silly is your jam, I think you’ll enjoy it.  🙂

Ladieeees and Gentledudes!  It’s here!  What you’ve all been waiting for!

The stoush of the century, the showdown to beat all showdowns, the take-no-prisoners death match of all time!

In the red corner, we have the champion, the old faithful, the never-beaten, bastion of taste and quality, the protector of all that is good in storytelling, the… PRINT BOOK!

And in the blue corner, the upstart challenger, the take-on-all-comers, cheap and cheerful bringer of the apocalypse the… E-BOOK!

It’s going to be an epic battle, one for the ages, so settle in and…

“Excuse me…”

The man with the microphone halted abruptly, startled into silence by a tug on his sleeve.  He wouldn’t normally have been put off his stride by a trifle, but this was no normal tug.  The hand on his sleeve was made of words.  Or, more accurately, one word.  The word ‘hand’, swelled in some places and twisted in others to make a workable finger and opposable thumb.  It was supported by the word ‘arm’, elongated to cover the distance between him and the screen of the e-reader in the blue corner.

He rubbed his eyes, but the hand didn’t go away.  Then he heard the voice again.

“I think you might be misrepresenting our relationship.”

There could be no mistake.  The voice was coming from the e-reader.

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Search Engine Funtimes

On this blog’s dashboard, there is a section that tells you what people typed into search engines that led them to this blog.  Often, mine are quite ordinary.  People have googled my name or something equally unsurprising.

But this week, I have had a bumper crop of search engine terms that made me wonder.

What, for example, were these people looking for, and did they find it?

How did juan antonio samaranch inspiration women

wordplay made from great gatsby

I can kind of understand how

x files coat

led them here, (I do love a good coat) and I know what post

Fairy tales of women salons

led to, but I’m a long way from knowing what they really meant by it.

I hope that

women who made their blogs well known

is prophetic and I was quite delighted to find

Girl with books in hand

led to me.

But I am at a loss to understand why Mr Google thought that the people who typed in:

smiles for email sexy

mansexy cop

would want to come here.

But none of these are a patch on my favourite (I swear I didn’t make this up):

Full fathom five+pollock

So, what weird search terms have you come across?  Or what weird results have you got while googling?  I’m sure this is just the tip of the iceberg…

And while you’re thinking, here’s a little Friday tune to bop you into the weekend…

Photo from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/

Imelda needs…

It’s Wednesday, which means it’s time for Whatever takes my fancy.  (And no, the picture is not what takes my fancy: it’s my reaction to what’s below…)

Today it is one from the vault.  A few years ago, among my mates, anyway, there was a craze for Googling your first name, followed by the word ‘needs’ and seeing what came up.

I don’t know how this worked for other people, but on the day I did it, it was as if the interwebs were trying to tell me something.  Regard:

Imelda needs an army and an elderly husband behind her to get anything done.
Apparently I am the origin of the question, ‘you and who’s army?’

Imelda needs a loan of US $225
Well, natch – who doesn’t?

Imelda needs a loan for $8000 MXN
This is getting silly now.  What’s with all the money-grubbing, all of a sudden?

Imelda needs to develop discipline and patience in order to achieve her aspirations
Okay, now it’s a little creepy.  Do you actually know me, Google?

And following that one, this one immediately after it made me completely lose it…

Imelda needs to write soft porn bodice ripper novels
Google has spoken! nuff said!

Imelda needs to be disciplined
Put this together with the previous two and one beverage alert is just not enough…

Imelda needs financial support
Until she starts selling the soft porn, anyway…

Imelda needs new shoes
Again, with the ‘doesn’t everybody?’

“But Imelda needs those shoes
Alright, already, I get it!  New shoes!

Miss Imelda needs to come a-knockin’ on Scotland’s door.
And now, for something completely different…

It’s silly!  It’s pointless!  But amusing… at least to me.

Do yours! Go on, you know you want to…

Tell me what you find! 🙂